FINDING GOD

FINDING GOD

The sunrise at the New Camaldoli Hermitage at Big Sur is amazing. The blue of the ocean and sky serves as the backdrop for transformation as the sun rises in the east and slowly illuminates the fog bank as light creeps over the coastal range. The pink and gold of the sun warm the molecules of moisture in the fog, expanding, shaping, and changing its color. I rise early not to miss it each morning of my silent retreat.

In August, the air temperature feels perfect in the early morning and evening; shirt sleeve weather with a gentle breeze that embraces.

It may be universal to conclude that "I find God in the mountains ... at the seashore ... in the sunset." It would seem that the pious, agnostic or atheist find a transcendent beauty in nature that inspires. The Judeo-Christian tradition certainly does. The Bible throughout reflects the praise of Psalm 8:

"Oh Lord, how majestic is your name in all the earth! You have set your glory above the heavens. When I look at the work of your fingers, the moon and the stars that you have established; what are human beings that you are mindful of them...?"

Yet in August at Big Sur, when the temperature is balmy and breezy, it is also perfect for the breeding of beach flies. These tiny black bugs live among the washed-up kelp and debris of the shore and head up the hills of Big Sur to propagate. These flies breed all the time, but in summer, up the sides of the hills, it is a festival!

One can't walk outside during the day without being covered with these bugs. The buzzing in one's ears is particularly annoying to one's piety if the flies have traveled with you into the chapel for prayer and meditation.

Many confess that "I find God in nature, in the majesty of Yosemite, in the brilliance of a sunset." I agree wholeheartedly. But is God in those nasty shore flies, too? Cancer is a part of nature. Earthquakes, lightning-caused forest fires, and hurricanes are all a part of nature, too. Is God to be found there as well?

The father of orthodoxy, Augustine of Hippo (354-430 CE), would say "yes." He posits that God directs all things toward an eternal conclusion that will make sense of what we have experienced as evil in our short time on earth. God uses all things, even black beach flies, for an eternal good that will be revealed to us at the end of time. So the faithful endure and accept the capriciousness of nature as part of the deal.

This is a comforting ideal for many. It gives reason and hope in the face of chaos and suffering. The difficulty is that it makes God the initiator of what humans experience as evil.

I don't buy it.

I reject Rev. Pat Robertson’s conclusion that God sent Hurricane Katrina to devastate New Orleans because of its reputation for sin. I am offended at the suggestion that God causes a five-year-old to die of terminal cancer for some "unknown good that will be revealed to us at the end of time." The God that is revealed to us in the death and resurrection of an ancient carpenter from Galilee is Love. What possible love would it be for Augustine's God to allow 24,000 of God's children to die every day of largely natural and preventable malnutrition related diseases for some "unknown good”?

When we look at the sunset or the mountain or the stream and see God in nature, it is not that God is in them so much as their beauty touches the God that is within us. That source of inspiration lies within. The agnostic or atheist may find this notion offensive, but when in awe of natural beauty, doesn't that say something about our capacity for transcendent wonder, whether we acknowledge a Supreme Being or not?

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder" is not only true about interpretation. Our hearts may be the source of inspiration of the clouds at sunset, or the calm when listening to the rhythm of the waves, or that sense of joy as we watch a whale breach.

With an open and contrite heart, indeed God can be found in the courage of patients living with cancer and the dedication of the medical teams working with them. We can see God at work in the first responders to natural and human-made disasters or the communities determined to rebuild afterward without attributing divine action as the cause of the earthquake, fire, or flood. With the right frame of mind and spirit, we can even appreciate little black beach flies as an essential part of the natural order. But we don't have to like them!